Shakespeare in the Park

Every summer, New York City sponsors a Shakespeare production in the park, free to the public. This year, the show is Twelfth Night, starring Anne Hathaway and Audra McDonald. At 1 pm, you pick up your ticket; at 8 pm, you attend the show.

How long would you wait in line for free tickets to see Twelfth Night in Central Park? On Tuesday, I decided that I would wait five hours, so I smooched Baby awake at 7:45 am and strolled him into the park by 8:00. When I saw that the line was a quarter of a mile long, I changed my mind. After I talked to a few people in various places in the line, I found out that on Monday night, the final ticket was distributed to a person who had arrived at 6:30 am. That person's spot in line was just ahead of a large rock by the swing sets in the Pinetum (lovingly known by Shakespeare in the Park line-waiters as the Rock of Hope). On Tuesday night I thought long and hard about how much I really wanted to see Twelfth Night. A lot, I decided.

Central Park doesn't actually open to until 6 am. So I was trespassing when I lugged my picnic blanket, diaper bag, and crossword puzzle book into the park at 5:30. At 5:39 I staked my claim in line along the fence at 83rd street. (Shakespeare in the Park line-waiters refer to this stretch of line as The Mulch and the people who wait there as Mulch People.) I was at least 100 people ahead of the Rock of Hope. I had come with good ticket karma in the form of a friend who had won tickets in the Wicked lottery three out of three times. I was gold, right?

Wrong. I didn't get the tickets. At 1:30 pm, defeated, I left the park with a heavy heart. Had I arrived a 5:38, one minute earlier, I would have gotten tickets. I could have literally reached out and strangled the last person who received tickets to last night's performance because that's how close they were in line.

Baby had the best day ever. He spent a long blissful morning inspecting pine cones, splashing in mud puddles (mulch puddles?), climbing on the Rock of Hope, and singing to a captive audience of Mulch People. So all was not lost.

And we had babysitting lined up and Husband had already made his excuses to get out of working. So Husband and I went out to eat on a double date with my friend (whose ticket karma is a teensy bit tarnished) and her husband. We ate coconut soup, beef curry, and barbequed chicken with peanut sauce. To my surprise and delight, my friend's husband dressed like a pirate and accidentally walked into a post.

And every person who got tickets to Shakespeare in the Park last night woke up this morning with swine flu, so, you know . . .